I ‘m receiving emails announcing new software products daily. But I can ‘t remember even one case when after reading such an email (unless it comes from Google), I ‘d want to try using the product, even for free. For example, this one is from yesterday:

“The XYZ project team is proud to announce the release of version 2.0 of ABC, the next generation XML parser/indexer. LMN version 1.0: the world ‘s first true native XML index that is simple, general-purpose and back-compatible with XML. ” And so on.

I would not even bother blogging about it, but our company is about to release a number cool commercial plugins, and I ‘ll need to write a press release that, most likely people will ignore. BTW,I hate the word cool. “We have just released a cool software that will make your life easier “. “Now the food in our restaurant is even better than before “. Give me a break, will you. The food is either good or bad. Do not offer me the software that will revolutionize my current experience with XML parsers.

Just teach me how to live without the need to write XML configurations to make my software work with yours, give me a real fast internet connection (I mean for real), give me some software that will let me live without worrying about viruses and service denial attacks while maintaining fast Internet connection. This will make me happy and improve my QoL (quality of life).

So when you ‘ll read the announcement about the cool plugins released by our company, just know, that this will be a quality software (typically, quality software engineers write quality software), we ‘ve enjoyed writing it and hope to get a little bit richer by selling it to you. But after purchasing our software, you ‘ll still will have to get up in the morning and go to work. Your life will not change dramatically. If it makes you happy, the last statements apply to us as well – we ‘ll keep going to work.

Most likely your firm will also become a little bit richer because our software will alow your sofware engineers seriously cut time-to-market and improve your users ‘ experience by the factor of 35.6 (Gartner or Forrester will come up with more precise metrics and will be happy to sell you an analytical report for a nominal fee of $54 a page ). Why did I even mentioned these cliches “time-to-market ” and “users ‘ experience “? Excuse my corporate language. Do not know any better.

Would you take a look at the trial version of our software, pleeeeease…